Treading Water.

I don’t know about you, but I have had periods of time in my life that I feel as though I am simply surviving. Like the motions I run through every day are just fabricated from muscle memory and are a facade for the place where my heart truly dwells. It’s in these times that the world feels the biggest; like a canvas of the sea drafted from turbulent waves and hidden perils, all painted a pleasing hue to hide its true nature.

And its only in times of peace that I can look back and pinpoint those moments when I was simply treading water. And I’m shocked to say that even as a nasty under current of grief swells below the surface, threatening to pull me under at any point in time, right now, I feel peace. And I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that that serenity comes from being right where the Lord wants me.

So many times, our human nature gets the best of us and we give into persistent emotions like that of impatience. We find ourselves fighting against the current, thrashing back towards the shore, when all the while God is calling us into the waves. It’s terrifying to not know exactly what lies ahead, and it’s easy to want to stay in our comfort zone, with the water at a safe level. We plant ourselves on the things that we are sure of, and yearn for the predictable to find its ways to our feet, like a seashell washing up on shore. But just as anyone who has ever struggled against the current knows, the more you fight it, the more challenging it becomes to keep your head above water. Sometimes the best decision, is to simply give into the current and wait for the stillness that follows. For it is in that stillness, that we find our opportunity.

For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:24-28

If you google the definition of treading water, it will tell you that it is a basic technique, a survival skill at best. But what it also tells us is that treading water is a skill that is most often times used before one learns to swim. I can remember moments in my life when I thought I knew exactly what I wanted, and I pursued the desires of my heart that I thought I needed. I thrashed towards them like they were a prize island situated just under the horizon. But as I expelled all of my energy trying to move towards some fleeting goal, I fought against waves that engulfed me, trials and tribulations that set me back around every corner. At first, they fueled my drive, propelling me forward each time I was pulled back, the energy of the challenge filling my lungs. But after fighting, and thrashing for so long, I was just exhausted. And defeated. It was only then, when I was at a true loss for what to do next, that I eventually looked up and realized that all the while, I had simply been spinning in circles. That the progress I thought I had been making was just a thinly veneered shade of confusion.

You see, all of us are guilty of setting aside our desire to seek God’s will for our lives to pursue something we thought we needed, or something the world has convinced us that it’s time for us to have. We have these mile markers we feel like we have to meet, or these earthly things we are convinced we have to have. And all the while that we are spinning in circles, treading water, God is patiently waiting for us to stop, take a breath, and look up. It’s hard, especially when you have a picture in your mind of what you think your heart desires. It’s hard, especially when you have people all around you telling you what you should be aiming for. It’s hard. But maybe, maybe it’s just simply exhausting because we are wasting our efforts on a basic skill like treading water, instead of focusing our energy on a more efficient way to get where we need to be. Maybe we just need to learn to swim.

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2

His good, pleasing and perfect will. There is no reason to be scared of the unknown, or frightened by the thought of simply drifting out to sea, because the Lord and Savior is your guiding light. If you are fighting so hard for something that just seems impossible, maybe its time to stop and look up.

Is what you are fighting for the will of your Lord and Savior, or a desire planted in your heart that falls short of the glory of God?

God doesn’t expect us to read his mind, nor did he create us to have the omniscience that he beholds. He calls for us to turn to him, to seek him and his perfect will. And sometimes that even means being completely still. Talk about terrifying. There is a storm brewing in your heart, the waves are tossing you around like a rag doll, but you’re supposed to just remain still? Sometimes that is exactly what God calls us to do, to be still and come to him in prayer and petition for his guidance in all walks of life. But the stillness doesn’t mean a deafening silence, or loneliness, it means clinging to God and waiting for him to show you your next move.

So how do you pass the time in that stillness? You swallow up his word with every fiber of your being. You read and labor over the love letter he has provided to us like a map to the treasures of your heart. You pray without ceasing for patience, and faith, and you trust in him to show you the way. And then you simply float, face up, riding every wave that comes your way. Because hidden somewhere in the folds of those whitecaps, there lies an opportunity that can prepare you for your future in the Lord’s embrace. With every wave that washes over you, one is bound to take your breath away and change your life.

God, I come to you know discouraged and defeated. I feel as though I am treading water in my pursuit of _______________________ and my heart is hurting. Help me to turn to you, to give you my desires. My prayer is that you would exchange those for your will for my life. Help me to seek your will in all that I do, and to be patient, for your it is in your time that you will reveal yourself. God, thank you for carrying me when the waves get rough, cradle me now as I wait for your call. Shed light upon whatever path you would have me travel, and give me strength to be the child you call me to be.

Amen.

Days of Doubt.

I’ve struggled with what to write about this week. Not because of writer’s block or a lack of content, but because I have battled with how to put on paper exactly what has been laid on my heart. My dad has prostate cancer, a very advanced form of it, and right before my eyes I have watched a strong, healthy man suffer not only from the disease itself, but from the treatment. There are so many loved ones in my life who are either battling cancer or watching someone they love fight and it breaks my heart. I struggle for words every day to say to them and to my family to comfort them.

What do you tell someone who’s life has been ripped out from underneath them like a rug when they get yet another dose of bad news? How do you remain positive for them but be respectful of the fact that their heart is literally breaking in front of you?

And while it seems that every human instinct in me should be questioning why such a horrible thing is happening to people I love and care about, good people, instead my heart seems to draw closer to the Lord every day. It is so hard to explain to people how I can keep my faith, because the last thing that crosses my mind is to question God’s will. In fact, the question that is constantly on my mind instead is what do people do who go through these things and don’t have God to lean on because they don’t have a personal relationship with him? As I searched my heart for answers, I continued to pray to God for strength, for myself and for those I love. And that’s when Psalm 23 crossed my mind.

“The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.” – Psalm 23

The magnitude of comfort that this Psalm brings is me indescribable. I have heard this preached, and taught, and recited since I was little and yet never has this passage meant more to me than now. I often describe the Bible, as many people do, as Christ’s love letter to us as Christians. Imagine sitting down and putting into a book everything that you ever wanted to tell or teach your children. How incredible this piece of literature is, as it is Christ’s personal instructions to us as to how to live life and survive whatever may come our way.

This Psalm in particular, to me, is so stripped down and honest that it resonates with my soul. Here is how I break it down and keep in hidden in my heart.

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.

Wow. To take this line and apply it to your life really reveals the life Christ called us to live. The Earth is our physical home for now, but we do not belong here. God has destined us for a far greater home with him in Heaven and in this verse we know everything we need to know about life with God. Though our egos and our human nature demands that we have worldly possessions, though we judge our success by our things, and our value as a person by the opinions of others, this verse tells us that if we have God, if we allow him to lead us through life, we will be ok. God has provided us with everything we could possibly need to survive and thrive with him. We lack nothing.

He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.

For me this part is twofold. One, this part of the passage says to me that God will satisfy every need we have if we allow him to be Lord of our lives. The Psalm as a whole equates God to a shepherd and us as his sheep. As a shepherd, he knows what is best for us, he knows how to help us steer clear of harm’s way and he will always provide for our physical and spiritual needs. We all know those people who seem to be constantly searching for something in life, they never feel fulfilled. They buy Earthly goods, or seek the companionship of others, thinking that it will leave them filling whole. But in truth, that fullness can only be felt when we put our trust and hope in God. He will provide for us in a way that no one else can.

This part of the passage to me is also God’s way of saying he knows what is best for us and sometimes that means lying down in green pastures. As humans we are driven to fix problems, to control situations and often times it is a true struggle to just be still. But that is what God calls us to do in certain instances in our life, to just be still and let him work. Just as a shepherd will give his flock rest as he prepares for the remainder of their journey.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

This right here is the most precious part of the entire Psalm to me. God promises us as Christians that no matter how hard things are, no matter how absolutely terrified we are, he is always there. There is nothing in our lives that we should fear, or worry about. Not even the evil things of this world or death itself, for if we are living in the glory of God, he will protect us and lead us through the hardest and most difficult times of our lives. For me, this is the passage I want to repeat every single day to my dad, and to those around me who are suffering as well. There are dark times in our life, God never promised there wouldn’t be. He equates those times to the valley of the shadow of death, teetering on the edge of the demise of our physical being, and yet there even still he remains with us, guiding us with his light and his staff until we can make it to the other side of that valley. But what may be perhaps the most difficult thing about this, is sometimes that outcome, that ascent from the valley is not what we want. It is not the answer we search for. But what it is, is God’s will for our life and it is far better than anything we could have ever planned ourselves.

He knows every single second of our lives before we are even born and much as a storyboard is laid out for a movie, he knows what scenes come next. Take comfort in the fact that our all-knowing and ever-present God knows what lies ahead and he knows exactly what lies beyond and he will get us there, one way or another. We only need to trust him and take comfort in his presence.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.

Again, the Lord shows us that we will encounter enemies, whether physical or spiritual. There are beings and things that will drag us down and threaten our spiritual well-being around every corner. But he is quick to show us that not only will he help us merely survive those times, but he will provide everything we need to go through them and then some. We can compare the description of “preparing a table” to laying out a feast for us. He will not merely provide a slice of bread to keep us moving, but will fill us with all of our desires.

Anointing our head can only be described as a Biblical practice that was used to honor and dignify a person. God does that for us by allowing us to live a righteous life through him. Despite what evil and darkness we may find in our lives, God always promises a robe of white and a life of goodness and mercy if we trust in him. So much so, that as described in the Psalm, it will run over and burst from its container. For me, this is every time I read his word or worship him through song, I truly feel like my heart may burst from how much happiness and true love he gives me. When I think about the people that have been placed in my life and the impact they have had on me, I feel full to the brim.

Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

And our final promise from God is what we can expect from a life with him, if we trust in him with all our heart and lean on him, goodness and mercy, love and protection, will always be a part of our lives. He promises strength for the times that are hard, and mercy for when we fall short. The house of the Lord to me in my relationship with him through the Holy Spirit. Because I accepted Christ so long ago, his spirit has been within my heart, guiding me and protecting me. The fact that I will have that for every day to come is what helps me pick myself up and put one foot in front of the other, each and every day.

God never promised that our time on Earth would be free from suffering and pain. What he did promise was eternal strength and love through him at all times, especially those days when we need it most. He promised fulfillment and satisfaction in everything through him. We must only seek him and his will to fill the fullness that we are programmed to yearn for. And not only will God provide for us, he will give us more than we deserve. Not in physical worldly possessions and measures of happiness, but in every Heavenly desire our heart, mind and soul can crave.

Some days are just hard. There are times I just want to stay in bed, cover my eyes, and lock the world out. I want to be selfish and run from everything that threatens my happiness. I sometimes feel like the world is closing in on me and the heaviness of the weight I carry is suffocating me. But in those moments of doubt, in those seconds of anger, my God is always with me. He is whispering in my ear, “Be still child, for I am here to comfort you, to love you, and to guide you through.”

God loves you, and he understands that we struggle to grasp his grace and goodness. He gets that there will be days of doubt. But he calls us to never let those emotions win, to fight against them with the grace and love he has tucked away in our hearts. I encourage you, when you struggle to find your way, pick up your Bible and remember this passage. For our God is an awesome God and his word is true and good.

He will never, ever forsake you.

Love Without Abandon.

I’m a dog person, it’s no secret. If we are friends on Facebook, fellow Tweeters on Twitter or connected on Instagram, you know that my feeds are full of pictures of my fur children. I have two dogs, one little and one big. They have their own unique personalities but the one thing they have in common is that they love their momma. As I type this blog, my Doddle is literally resting his head on my shoulder.

Being a dog mom has taught me a lot, it’s given me patience and showed me that if I can make it through the puppy years, I can raise a child one day. But the most important thing that my sweet boys have taught me is how to love. It may seem strange to think of an animal that doesn’t speak our language or share our belief system as the perfect symbol of how we should love, but I truly believe that the love a dog shows is the purest love and the closest we will ever get here on Earth to knowing the true immensity of God’s love.

Let me explain.

My pups meet me at the door every time I come home, and their excitement is uncontainable. They are wagging their tails, licking my toes, and doing their very best to get my attention and let me know that they are so happy to see me. Our doodle is one-year old, and Andy my shih-tzu mix is only three. I remember their younger year very vividly. I got frustrated a lot and let’s face it, I still lose my temper with them now and again. But you know what? No matter how loud I yell at them, or how many times I get angry with them, they are always right back at my feet, begging to be loved.

As sad as it is, we see it all the time in the news. Every time a new animal neglect case comes up or animal cruelty pictures surface, those gruesome photos depict the face of a poor dog who loved its owner despite their cruelty and shortcomings. We see a heartbroken, defeated animal learn to trust a human again in such a short time. We see a puppy who gets a second chance with a new family and falls in love with them all over again. It seems that no matter what this world does to these defenseless babies, they bounce right back and learn to love in spite of it all. We could learn something from our furry friends.

But what may be the most rewarding thing ever about being a dog owner is their ability to love endlessly without expecting anything in return. Sure they like to be loved on, they are hearty eaters and enjoy the occasional stroll through the park with you. But they demand none of it. They would love you the same if you both sat day in and day out in one spot and never ate again.

“And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30-31

The greatest commandment that God ever gave us in the Bible was to love; to love Him with all our hearts and to love our neighbors as ourselves. And yet as humans, this is often one of the most difficult task for us. We are quick to judge others, we are afraid to expose our hearts and we hide behind walls that prevent us from loving unconditionally. And we are skeptical. We are threatened by anything that presents itself as pure love. We are quick to discount it, and toss it out of our way because it scares us.

Whether it is in a relationship with a significant other, a second chance connection with someone who hurt us or basking in the light of a potential love, we often run and guard ourselves from hurt. I sometimes wonder if it is that exact reason that often times people stray from the church and God’s love because they just don’t quite get how someone as awesome and powerful as God could love them, and forgive them and keep on loving them through all of the bad and the good. But the truth is, he does. Our God is an amazing God that loves us no matter what we do.

Do your reservations about love hold you back in life? Is it holding you back from the relationship with your Lord and Savior that you crave?

The Bible itself tells us to guard our hearts, they truly are important. But for us that typically means hiding our hearts, and containing them from the cruelties of this world. But I encourage you to not let the state of our world, or the hurt you’ve experienced keep you from a true relationship with God. Open your heart to him, only there will you find the peace and comfort you crave. The truth is, each and every one of us have a God-shaped hole in our heart that is yearning to be filled with the Holy Spirit. And if you have been holding God at an arms length, scared of what that love may feel like, you my friend are missing out on one of the greatest things we will ever experience. God’s love can change not only your life, but your eternity.

“But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.” Luke 6:35

And perhaps what is often times even harder than the immensity of love, is giving something so dear to you to someone who has done you wrong. But even so, God calls us to not only love Him, love ourselves, and love our neighbors, he calls us to love our enemies. If we are so guarded against love from those we care about, it may seem impossible to love someone we despise.

As Christians we have something that no one else has; the perfect role model. God is the very definition of perfection and his love is the purest and most real love you will ever experience in your life. He loved us so much that he sent his only son, Jesus, to be crucified on a cross, ridiculed and beaten, just so that we could have the choice to live free of sin. God himself said it in John 15 “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” And that is exactly what Jesus did for us. I encourage you as Christians to look to the example of your Heavenly Father to love one another.

How are you holding back from giving your love away to those in your life?

Have you had bad experiences with love in the past? Were you done wrong by someone when you had just opened your heart to vulnerability of truly falling in love? Or maybe you had your love taken advantage of by a family member or friend and you were left feeling scorned and exposed. Whatever the case may be, I encourage you today to not let that experience keep you from experiencing one of the greatest gifts God has ever given to us. There is a hole in our hearts that is perfectly carved out to hold the love that we will carry with us through our lives here on Earth. God intends for us to find fellowship and companionship with our brothers and sisters on Earth through friendship, a church family, a husband or wife or even the joy of a pet. What he didn’t intend for us to do was take a gift so great as love and find a hole in the ground and bury it so we never have to be hurt by it.

So if you are on teetering on the ledge of falling in love, jump in with both feet.

If you are cultivating a new friendship, open your heart and soul to that person.

If you are married to the love of your life, cherish them and tell them how you feel every day.

If you have children, encourage them to love without abandon.

If you have a furry little head resting on your shoulder, give that sweet puppy kisses every day.

But don’t stop there, share your love with others by doing things out of love. Don’t do things because you feel obligated, or because you have to. Do things because in your heart you feel that small tug that says “this is right.” Look for ways to do small acts of kindness for others. And when you experience one yourself, find a way to pay it forward. If there is anything that we can do as Christians in a world so full of hate, it is love. You have no idea the amount of power you have sitting right there in your chest. If we open our hearts and let the love that our Heavenly Father gave us poor out into our everyday life, we can change the world.

I pray that every day you would pick up your Bible and read this verse. Memorize it, put it on a post it in every room of your house and carry it in your hearts. Live this verse, practice this verse and share this verse with the world because nowhere will you find a more perfect definition of how we are called to love one another…except maybe through the eyes of a man’s best friend.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

A Glowing Ember.

Forgiveness. What a mighty big word. But what is even larger than the implications that word carries is the responsibility it carries for us as Christians. Last week we talked briefly about anger and the gasoline that it can be.  While we touched on forgiveness, we focused more on the actual act of getting angry. As we settle in and set our sights on forgiveness and what that means, I want to look at a definition.

em·ber

/ˈembər/

noun

a small piece of burning or glowing coal or wood in a dying fire.

Now I want you to close your eyes, and use your imagination on this one. Imagine, you started a fire in your fire pit in the backyard and you’ve long since quit feeding it kindling in hopes that it will go out soon. The smoke and bright orange flames are long gone, but what’s left it a handful of ash with a small glowing ember in the bottom of the pit.

But is this fire a dying fire, or one just starting?

You could walk away from that ember now and if you’re lucky, it will go out and all is well. Or you could stroke it a bit by slowly breathing oxygen on the ember, or maybe feeding it a small log. It could slowly grow back into a raging fire if you want it to. But what if you walk inside the house, grab a bottle of lighter fluid and flood the ember with accelerant? That ember will quickly become a full fledged bonfire, lighting up the night. If not taken care of it could quickly escalate out of control.

Bu what if you put it out?

What if you grabbed the water hose and dumped a bucket of water on that ember? You would likely see a ton of smoke and the absence of its glow when the smoke cleared.

Now imagine that ember represents a grudge you’re holding onto against someone.

Maybe you’ve quit feeding that fire a long time ago, you don’t let things that person does or says affect you in any way. Maybe they have apologized and you all seem to be on sure footing again with your relationship. But deep within you, you know that there is still that ember burning ever so slightly. What you choose to do next, could change the course of your existence. Forgiveness is a powerful thing when we let it be.

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13

It’s so easy to hang onto anger, to let it linger in our lives until we convince ourselves that the person we are angry with owes us. It is easy to store the hurt from a wrong that has been done to you in your heart and pull it out as a trump card when the situation is right. But as Colossians shows us, God calls us to forgive. No where in the Bible does it speak of holding grudges, getting revenge or collecting on debts from those who have done you harm. In fact, in this very verse, we are called to forgive as God forgave us. Wow. What if we looked at our current resentment that we have against our brother or sister in comparison to the ultimate price that Jesus paid for us on the cross? How does whatever that person did to you compare to what Jesus endured while he was painstakingly beaten, shamed, tortured and slain for our sins. For the sins of us, people who didn’t even exist yet. How do the two compare?

You may think it seems silly to compare these two things but what we can pull from this verse is that no matter what we do in our lives, no matter how many times we pull away from God, screw up, or disappoint him, he will never not forgive us. No where in the Bible does it say that if you sin 10 times you will be forgiven, but if you sin 11 he is done with us. The God we serve is a loving, and forgiving God who takes us back with loving arms every single time we do wrong. So who are we to hold a grudge against someone who is merely human?

It is easy to tell ourselves that this is comparing apples to oranges, but the truth is that God has never called us to do something that he himself, or his Son has not already endured. Just as the verse tells us, God is asking us to be merciful with our fellow man and to forgive them each time they wrong us just as he forgave us and continues to every day.

In Luke 17, God even takes it a step further telling us there should be no end to our mercy for others.

“Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.” Luke 17:4

We must forgive our brothers and sisters each time they fail us. Every time they come seeking our forgiveness, we must give it them.

So what happens if we don’t forgive one another?

Let’s revisit our scene from earlier. Obviously pouring water on that ember is the equivalent of forgiveness. We completely smother any grudge or resentment we have for the one we are angry with and extinguish that bitterness. But what happens if we don’t put it out, but just walk away from it? This is basically letting it go, right? Wrong. Sure, that ember could extinguish itself with time. But what if it doesn’t? What if a whisper of air comes flowing by and breathes a little bit of life back into the ember? What is a snide comment, or reminder of their wrongdoing cross our path? That ember will get a little bit brighter and a little bit bigger, slowly growing until it’s once again a raging flame. We often hear people distinguish between forgive and forget. I truly believe that to forgive someone, we must forget what they have done to us. We must move past whatever is grounding us to our anger and seek the Lord’s guidance to forget and forgive.

What about the lighter fluid?

Have you ever been so fed up with someone and their ways that you explode with anger? That you give up on them, express your feelings of anger in an uncontrollable way and then let that anger consume you for the rest of the day, putting you in a terrible mood to the point you are snapping at those who weren’t even involved? That our lighter fluid. Allowing ourselves to give into anger, to give into holding that grudge and harboring bitterness. When we do that, we are letting it control us and drive our actions until we don’t even recognize the person staring back at us in the mirror. If you let it, anger and bitterness can wreck your world, just as quickly as a campfire can turn into a forest fire. One that is unstoppable and headed straight for everything you have ever known and loved.

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31-32

Your Heavenly Father is calling you to let go of any resentment and anger you hold in your heart. He is standing right next to you holding a bucket full of water saying, “Put it out, child.” Will you  listen? I encourage you to pray this prayer if you are seeking freedom from the bitterness you carry with you.

God, I come to you now as a sinner. As your child who has let you down so many times and accepted your forgiveness 100 times over. I come to you asking for your help and your strength to let go of the bitterness in my heart. Help me to move past the anger I have stored up, and step out of the past into a future that is rid of the darkness that comes from letting anger rule my life. Forgive me for being so slow to forgive my brothers and sisters as you have called me to. And God, help me to see those that I am angry with as flawed children of God just as I, myself am. And God, help me to pray for those I have turmoil with, help me to pray for their weaknesses and their missteps and help me not only forgive, but to forget, right here, right now. I lay my bitterness down at your feet God, take it and make me whole again.

A Mere Whisper in the Wind

Many of us have been taught from a young age that when you are searching for answers or seeking guidance, to pray for God to send you a sign. This is such a loaded statement because who are we to know what is a sign and what is something we are interpreting the way we want to? Many times the desires of our heart drive what we see and what we hear. One of my all-time favorite stories in the Bible is that of Elijah in 1 Kings 19. This story is packed full of lessons that are cloaked in the narrative of one of God’s greatest messengers. Elijah is an interesting character in himself, for we can relate to his life very much so as humans. While we do not deal with quite the same trials and tribulations that he did, and our triumphs are of a different colors, the ups and downs of this prophet’s life are the same as the ones we face today. I encourage you to explore the entire story of Elijah, but for today, let’s focus on his time on the mountain.

Elijah, in trying to fulfill the will of God in his life, was faced with turmoil and trouble, resistance and heartache. He was tired, he was frustrated and he didn’t know what else to do. But the Lord reached out to him:

“The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.” Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.” 1 Kings 19:11-13

This isn’t a piece of scripture you see on a sign in someone’s house, and it’s not going to be a meme on Facebook. However, the message it sends to Christians is so loud to me and resonates with my soul. That’s why, as I mentioned above, it stands to be one of my favorites. See Elijah was in a period of wavering faith at this point in time. We’ve all been there. We are human and we fall short of the glory of God. So in times of hardship, we often back away from our faith and search for something more physical or permanent to make us feel better. And while those worldly things may offer immediate gratification and temporary relief from our woes, the strain of wavering faith is nothing compared to emptiness without Christ.

It’s hard, even as a Christian, to completely and utterly trust in God to deliver you from a time that is so trying that your body just wants to lay down and give up. We go through things that challenge us, things that beat us down until we feel like even with God we can’t get back up again. For some it’s the weight of problems you are currently facing. For others, it’s a constant resistance throughout life that at some point you just feel like you have to give up or lose yourself in the process. And in Elijah’s situation, that weight was his faith and his devotion to delivering the message God was calling him to deliver. This perhaps is the greatest challenge of all, to keep your faith when the call to action of that very faith is what is causing your suffering. God tells us in the Bible that it will not be easy for Christians that we will struggle and often be persecuted for our faith. And while we know that he paid the ultimate price for us, we are human and selfish and sometimes we just don’t think we can go on. That is exactly where Elijah was. He had just had his life threatened for the work he was doing, and the work he was doing was appearing fruitless and quite frankly, he was done with all of it. But the Lord came to him, in this most trying time and told him to go out on the mountain, that the Lord was about to pass by. So Elijah, being the faithful servant he was, pulled himself back to his feet and obeyed this command. What happens next is incredible.

The scripture says a “great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord.” Imagine, the worst storm we’ve ever had, then intensify that. We are talking a wind that is so strong, that it has the ability to tear pieces of rock from the mountain, to take rocks that no man could ever even begin to lift, and shatter them. We equate power with God, so this earth shattering wind sounds appropriate for such a higher power, right? But the Lord was not in that wind.

The next line says that “there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire.” We know from experience that earthquakes are next to impossible to prevent. They can’t be stopped, we simply have to ride it out and pray that we make it through. No matter what procedures we put in place, there is only so much we can do to simply protect ourselves from this horrific event. One that shakes everything you stand on. And fires are devastating and have the ability to wipe out what would takes months to build in a matter of minutes. They can tear through a town without slowing down. Sure water can help fight them, but sometimes even that is not enough. There couldn’t be a more appropriate vehicle for the one who created the Earth, right? Wrong. The scripture tells us that God was in neither of those. But what comes next is the kicker, the line that gets me every time I dive into this chapter.

“And after the fire came a gentle whisper.”

Three great, intense, and powerful forces of nature and yet Elijah found God in a whisper. So many times we look for these earth shattering, show stopping signs from God to tell us which way to turn and yet we often forget to listen for the whisper of his voice. We are so busy waiting on the search and rescue crew to coming sweeping in on a helicopter that we sometimes find ourselves drowning when all the while there was a boat sitting next to us.

What fork in the road have you come to that you have been praying for a sign from God to lead you? Think back, was there a whisper in the wind that you could have missed?

It’s human nature to fall down, for our feet to falter and for us to lose sight of our faith in times of trials. God understands that, and that is what makes him so amazing. Time after time, his grace finds us on our face and picks us back up and dusts us off. He is forgiving and takes us back every time we stray away. But what we have to do is learn to not just wait and look for the signs and miracles we think should come, but rather train ourselves as children of God to look for the whisper in the wind. One way to do that is by reading our Bibles, learning the scripture and holding it close to our hearts. This is a verse that I personally cling to when I feel my physical feet failing me. We must look to his word for the answers to our questions, and listen to his voice to find what we seek. It won’t always be a search and rescue team, it may not even be a boat at all. Maybe it’s just a life vest to keep you afloat until God picks you up and takes you to the place where he needs you most.

“…And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” 1 Corinthians 10:13

God tells us flat out in his word that he will never forsake us or give us more than we can bear. No matter how defeated we feel, God knows our limits and he knows our strength…because he is both of those things to us. He tells us in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that he will provide a way out of life’s hardships and he will help us endure it. So I invite you to take all of that time that you spend worrying, all of that time you spend trying to find your own way out of the darkness, and use that time to learn God’s word, pray to our Heavenly Father, and wait for the whisper in the wind.

Isn’t it incredible to know that the Creator of Earth, the God of all things, the Alpha and the Omega needs only a whisper to show you the way? What a mighty God we serve.